Why do I dread sprints for days beforehand? I count down the seconds until I actually have to commit to doing them (the commitment actually occurs about 2 seconds before I actually start the first sprint). Yesterday's sprints killed me. I got through them -- barely. It was just a bad running day. My goal this year really is to learn to love running. Or at least be on speaking terms with it. I think I don't like it because speed completely eludes me. I read in the back of the Total Immersion book (thank you, Tri Girl Kate T!) that there is a running book called Chi Running by Danny Dryer that is supposed to tweak my running in the same way that TI did my swimming. But, the thing is, swimming came too easily for me. I never had to work like I do when I run. I was not on a swim team growing up. I mean, I played in the pool -- but it was more like diving for rings and pretending I was a mermaid. Four years ago was the first time I used the pool for anything but to cool off if I'd been in the sun too long. After 3 workouts I was keeping up with the faster girls and by the end of the season I could hold my own with the fastest in our group. So, really, the fact I could swim really shocked the heck out of me. The same thing sort of happened with biking. I rode a bike as a kid but until 4 years ago, stationary biking was all I did. I wish that running would just drop into my lap like that.
I remember after my very first run, I called my husband at work and told him to stay on the phone with me because I was sure I was going to pass out and he was going to have to call 911 -- and I had only run about 3/4 of a mile! At that particular moment I really regretted all those days I skipped running track in school because I always told them I had cramps! And now I'm running 13 miles tomorrow. Wow! Isn't it amazing when you think about how far you've come?
Someone said something to me the other day that really blew me away. They called me a "natural athlete"! It's hard for me to consider myself an athlete, much less a "natural" one!! Isn't it funny how people perceive you? I was NEVER even remotely close to an athlete growing up. Actually, I was a very overweight couch potato until I was 17. My sister was always the little, athletic one. I was considered the chubby smart girl. It's not that I was picked last in teams -- it's that I didn't play at all. I was sort of paralyzed by my weight. In my late-teens/early 20's I lost the weight but I was left with a pretty brutal eating disorder which I had to learn to overcome and manage through the years. Until triathlons I always worked out to lose weight -- now, I still battle my demons, but when I'm training I FEEL like an athlete and my focus is on being stronger and healthier -- not smaller. How GREAT is that?! It's really helped me show my girls that healthy means doing great things for your body. If you treat your body right, it will be whatever size and shape it is supposed to be and that in itself will be beautiful!
Okay, enough self-reflection for today. I've got to get to bed so that I can try to take on those West Creek hills on my run tomorrow! AAH!
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Wow Cyndi, Who knew? You are such an inspiration! To your girls and to us girls. I love the message you are teaching for them...providing for them...showing them. And they payoff for both of us, I hope is that our daughters will have it easier than we did when it comes to being healthy and having a strong and healthy self image.
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