Seriously?!?

Is fate playing some sort of evil little joke on me? I'll make this short -- my doctor (who is the head of the practice's sports medicine deparment) was out of town last week when my MRI films first came back. The doctor acting in his absence stated "stress reaction" so that is what we've been basing my treatment on. Yesterday I had a follow up with my doctor and he elluded to the fact that he thought he did, indeed, see a crack in my bone. I didn't think much of it because there was still the chance it was a stress reaction -- and I wanted to be optimistic. He said he was going to have a friend of his (who also happens to be the head of VCU's sports department) take a second look at my films. Today I got a call. He and the other doctor both concur that after a second examination of my films they most definitely see a crack. It is a full stress fracture. I am now on crutches. I can do NOTHING for two weeks. This SUCKS!!!!

You know, you get to a point where you just have to laugh. I'm not there yet.

(PS - I am so grateful for all of you guys and your kind words though! It really does make me feel so much better. Thank you . . . )

Bye-bye Pink Lake . . .

I had another doctor's appointment today to discuss my full recovery plan. Long story but White Lake is out. He really feels that it's just not enough time to heal well enough to run that distance. He did make me one guarantee: if I did run White Lake I would most definitely come home in some serious pain and, quite possibly, with the kind of stress fracture that would require pins or crutches in order to immobilize the hip. He actually said he didn't think I should walk it -- primarily because he thinks I would end up deciding to run (God, am I that transparent?!?). I finally conceeded and said I would do whatever I needed to do to make sure I could race at 100% at Timberman. So the plan now is 4 weeks of swimming (no pushing off the walls) and cycling. I will then let my body do what my body can do and heal in the amount of time it takes to heal so that I can race strong in New Hampshire.

I need to say this outloud: I am SOOOOOO bummed. Many, many tears have been shed(and, really, I don't cry). I'm hoping Set Up will agree to let me pull someone in as a runner and I can turn my entry into a relay but I'm still waiting to hear from them. Otherwise, I will still go to White Lake. I will swim and bike my ass off and then miserably sulk up to an official and grudgingly turn in my chip -- as a DNF. O-u-c-h. I have never quit anything in my life. This is going to hurt.

I'm going to have a glass of wine and allow myself to just sit and pout tonight. Tomorrow I will realize that I'm a damn lucky lady who should be counting the millions of blessings I have instead of magnifying one disappointing hiccup in in my life. But, again, tonight I allow myself to wallow. :(

The results are in . . .

Well, it is not a full fracture. It's a stress reaction of my left femur. What the heck does that mean? Oh, I'm so glad you asked because I, too, had no clue. Apparently, stress fractures are more complex than one might think. And some doctors no longer refer to incidents of stress on your bones as a "fracture" and only refer to them as stress reactions unless you have a complete fracture. From my conversation with my doctor I understand it this way: there are three levels of stress related injuries to your bone: stress reactions (swelling of the bone marrow which causes stress to the outer layer of the bone) which then leads to a stress fracture (cracks in the outer layer from the swelling) then a full fracture (more like a splintering of the outer layer of bone). Although I am in the stage of "stress reaction" he said based on the MRI films he feels that I would have advanced to the level of "stress fracture" had I continued for even one more week of running. Damn. Had I followed Dr. A's instructions (which was to do physical therapy on my hip flexor, take a short run to "loosen up" today and then do the 13.1 on Sunday) he feels I would most definitely have come home with a stress fracture.

Okay, so what's the plan? One, no longer follow anything Dr. A said. Two, I take two full weeks off of running and cross-train on anything that does not cause ANY amount of pain to the femur. I'm hoping my plan can be to bike, swim and use the elliptical or do deep water running. In two weeks I can try running 1/4 to 1/2 mile to see how much healing has occurred. If I'm not in pain for a day or two after the run, I can do it again. Then I can begin increasing by 1/2 mile-1 mile at a time based on my pain levels. If I feel pain at all, I back off and then continue from where I was before I increased my mileage.

So, what the hell does that mean for White Lake? Well, here's my plan. I'm racing. Period. I'm going to follow the doctor's orders to a "T" until White Lake. Then, I'm racing -- sure, it won't be fast and it's sure to be a bit painful but I'll finish. I mean, really. It's not like I was planning on winning anyway. If I come home with a stress fracture then I will take 6-8 weeks off of running and I'll still have 6 weeks to ramp up for Timberman. If I don't come home with a stress fracture but find that my healing has been compromised, then I just start over with the slow, short runs while monitoring my pain level. Of course, this "Super Plan" has not been reviewed by my doctor (or by Coach G)!

I'm bummed about the time off from running but I do appreciate that in our efforts to get me seen ASAP, Derek and I accidentally made appointments for me with two different doctors on the same day. And I appreciate that my friend Jenn told me to just go ahead and see both when I told her I was going to cancel one of them. Had that not happened, I would have cancelled my appointment with Dr. B and just seen Dr. A. And, then I would have been in a world of hurt!!

You know, I'm really kinda pissed at Dr. A. See, if I only had gone to Dr. A I would have done the physical therapy thing thinking that I simply had a tight hip flexor. Not only would I have run the Half Marathon this weekend but I would have continued running afterward thinking that my hip flexor was just tight. And, do you know what could happen if a stress fracture of the femur goes untreated and becomes a full-on fracture? Look it up. It's not good. Let me put it this way, 2008 would have been shot. Maybe a lot of 2009, too. And, the more doctors I speak to, the more I've been told that because of the complications associated with a stress fracture of the femur, the industry standard is to get an MRI. X-rays are almost useless unless the stress fracture is very advanced. Shouldn't Dr. A have known this??? Honestly, it pisses me off.

Anyway, at least White Lake's 1/2 is not completely out of the question. I guess I'll just have to be really good about listening to the doctor. That's a challenge for me -- but Derek is here to make sure I don't get all "teenage rebel" about it.

To all you gals running Shamrock this weekend GOOD LUCK!! Run fast and I hope you have a tailwind the entire way! I'll be thinking of you!!! xoxo

First off -- let me say -- I know a bunch of really smart women!! It's clear that everyone thinks I need to check out what the heck is going on with my leg before I commmit to any kind of running right now. And, I agree. DB's comment really hit home. Injuries do suck. Missing a race sucks. Missing an entire tri season would suck WAY more.

So, tomorrow I'm going follow Dr. A's advice and go to physical therapy to work out my hip flexor AND I'm following Dr. B's advice and getting my MRI. Luckily, Dr. B was able to talk the hospital into fitting me in -- albeit at 9pm at night! Who knew they did MRI's that late? I supposed I should "appreciate" (see, I'm using my "word"!) that I'm able to get it done so quickly. I'm not sure how long it will take before I get the results back but I'm hoping before the weekend. If it's a stress fracture, I'll deal with it. If it's not -- then I'll do a crazy, excited, little happy dance, take it easy, go to PT and then see how I feel about Sunday.

I, too, was a lot smarter about my "training" today and did the injured athlete's favorite exercise: swimming. That means I've swam TWICE in the same week!! That in itself is a miracle! It actually felt really nice to just chill out and swim. I managed to swim close to 2 miles before I got ridiculously bored and had to leave. I'm hoping that the swimming will at least keep me from gaining weight from all the "stress related" chocolate I've been eating!!

Hope . . .

Today I went to the doctor -- well, two doctors actually because I wanted an instant second opinion. Both doctors specialize in sports medicine and both doctors gave me almost the same diagnosis for my leg pain. They suspect I may be suffering from a femoral stress fracture or a femoral neck stress fracture. Both doctors have different ways of dealing with this but it starts with an x-ray, MRI and hope/prayer/wishing that it is not a stress fracture and it is only some other weird obscure pain that develops as a part of training.

Anyway, here's what was said:

Doctor "A": This doctor read the x-rays and said that there did not seem to be a stress fracture. I was told that I could run but not bike and that I should see a physical therapist to do exercises to loosen my hip flexors. The theory was that the hip flexors could be putting pressure on my femoral nerve and is causing me to experience a "pinched nerve" feeling when I run. Okay, I'll buy that. But, I have to admit it seemed a little odd to me that Dr. A also said that I could continue running and it would be no problem to run the half-marathon this weekend. I mean, I'm seriously limping after a two mile run. Not that I don't think I could make it through a half marathon. My last long run was about 10 miles. It hurts when I start and it KILLS when I finish but it's somewhat manageable during the actual run.

Doctor "B" also ordered x-rays but said that most stress fractures to the femoral neck cannot be seen on an x-ray and, therefore, should be followed up with an MRI. Dr. B said that we could not really think about a recovery plan until we could definitively rule out stress fracture. What? I mean, I at least want options!! he said stress fracture would mean weeks of elliptical, biking and swimming instead of running. NOT the answer I wanted -- I'd rather go with Dr. A's whole tight hip flexor thing. He also said that I could bike but not run AT ALL until we got the results back since continuing to run on a femoral stress fracture can sometimes -- albeit rarely -- do so much damage that it causes complete hip replacement in an otherwise healthy young individual. Uh, no thank you.

So, I spoke with a friend of friend in the medical field. We'll call this one Doctor "C". Dr. C said that Dr. A should probably not have done some of the testing that was done on me (like asking me to jump up and down on one foot) if there was even the slightest indication that I had a femoral stress fracture. Dr. C also said that stress fractures of this type don't commonly show up on x-rays unless they are severe and concurred that an MRI is needed to completely rule out a stress fracture. Dr. C also said if two doctors' initial thought was that it was a stress fracture, then I needed to make sure that I was fully checked out before running again. If for no other reason than to get myself mentally straight during the run. The last thing I would need during a long run is to think I could be damaging myself to the point of needing a hip replacement! Although, that seems a little dramatic to me. I mean, really, a hip replacement? I'm not sure if I'm buying that.

But, keep in mind, I'm also a COMPLETE idiot. You know what I did? I actually was so upset about this that I went to the gym and got on the elliptical -- but then got pissed that I couldn't run and got on the treadmill and knocked out 2 miles. Sure I had to hold the handrails for the first 1/4 mile but then I felt okay. And then I walked like Quasimodo to my car and went home to take some Ibuprofen with a large wine chaser. Okay, and you want to know something else that's weird? Honestly, the only reason I'm blogging about this is because I'm superstitious. I think if I say it outloud, then I'll put a jinx on the whole "stress fracture" thing and it will really end up being nothing. I know. I'm totally strange. See why it was so difficult for me to narrow my weirdness down to only seven things in that earlier post? Honestly, I think I may be borderline retarded.

Anyway, now I have no clue what to do. Run the Half on Sunday (yay! but, ouch)?? Not run it (boo! but is that smarter since White Lake's in 2 months?)??? ARGH! I just don't know. Should I go with Dr. A because it's more of what I want to hear? Or play it safe and go with Dr. B who is being more conservative?? Damn. I have no clue what to do!!!!!!!!!!!

For now, I think I'll just hope it goes away. And have another glass of wine.

Muscle Bob Buff Pants, Here I Come . . .

Tonight I. Went. Swimming. Yep, you heard right. "SpongeBob Arms" went to swim training! Okay, I realize that that's not really that impressive since it's only the first official swim training of the year! But, it felt SOOOO good and I'm really going to try to make it to more swims this year. So to keep me honest and on track I'm publicly stating where I'm at and where I hope to be by the end of the season:

Current times:
100 yard swim: 1:19
Running timed mile: 7:39; 10k: 54:13
Average bike speed based on my last 27 mile ride: 17.6 mph (okay, that hurt to write down -- I consistently averaged 19 mph on 50 miles rides last year. Apparently, I've gotten lazy -- that sucks.)

End of Season Goals:
100 yard swim: 1:05
Timed mile: 7:15; 10k: 50 minutes; 5k: 25 minutes
Average bike speed for a 50 mile ride: 20 mph

Okay. So now that it's there in black and white, I'm hoping it will help me stay focused to do it!! But, if I resort back to my old ways and you don't see me at swim training -- feel free to harass the hell out of me!!!